Life grabbed her up by the hair
and had left her for dead
she ran to get help but they laughed as she bled
so she traded her Pain for her Truth instead
and when the sun sank low behind the horizon
she straddled Strength with boot spurs dangling
and rode it like a dangerous cowboy
My transformation from Christian to Witch.
I have met many a Christian witch as she begins her process of taking on more attributes of the Goddess and learning more about the craft. Many have difficulty transitioning because of what they were taught as “bad” or “demonic”. I am here to tell ya, there is NOTHING about the craft which is evil. Evil comes from the person, just as it does in any religion or faith. I began my Goddess path right after my husband of ten years and I divorced. Around the fall of 2009, I began seeking answers to this prodding in my soul to see myself in God’s eyes. I was tired of hearing how women must obey men and serve them. My first marriage had been very violent and after the divorce I was told by many Christians that once you are married you are bound eternally to that man. If you marry again you are committing adultery so therefore at the age of twenty-six I believed I was doomed to being alone the rest of my miserable life. I was devastated. I truly felt God was out to get me, hated me, to condemn me to such a life, if I chose Him as my Light. I couldn’t understand how Jesus could be a freeing God and yet bound me in slavery eternally to a man that abused me. Finally, I made my way to my Pastors office. There my Pastor showed me the scripture in the Bible, 1 Corinthians, stated that if as a believer my husband wanted to leave me and was unsaved I would be free! Free to marry again and not be condemned as God had called all of us to live in peace. Now as I realize that all of us are children of God and that no one is condemned unless they choose I see the bigger picture.I still didn’t feel free.
A Sudden Revelation
I felt in my heart that something was missing. One day while I was at work at one of my mental health jobs and standing outside with my clients at their normal horticulture class; suddenly, I became aware of the artichokes pushing up from the Earth like little babies. It was the strangest feeling, as if I could feel their essence and the amazement of their birth assaulted my heart with so much power it was like feeling alive for the first time in my existence! I received the revelation that the Earth was a primal Mother essence that not only births food and nutritional resources but life itself! It was a powerful moment of awakening and I suddenly became aware of people’s life imprint and honed into one client in particular. He was of Native American descent, I was told, and I was right and his grandmother Evelyn had a message for him. As I relayed the message tears welled up in his eyes. This man left the center a few weeks later and never returned to my joy!
I soon identified this tangible Mother presence in the earth and felt as if I was somehow a piece of that energy. I had spent most of my life walking on the soft sands of the earth, sliding joyfully ignorant through the sweetly scented blades of grass and clusters of fragrant flowers. However, I never once acknowledged that the Earth was more than just something for my use.
“When my eyes opened to the pregnant abundance that all the Earth is; it was then I realized all that God is, and all that I am as well. Guilt and low self-esteem cannot stay in the presence of such Greatness!
Fear based thoughts turn to puffs of dust when you realize that all of the Earth and all of mankind is your Sister and your Brother.”
A year later after my divorce, I did some more soul searching. I researched tirelessly within my care-worn, highlighted Bible and several notebooks full of notes and revelations strewn all over my room. I discovered the Great Goddess Holy Spirit. The Mother of the Universe, Queen of Heaven, the Beginning and Co-Creator of the Universe! The deeper I delved into the Womb of Rebirth, the Great Well of Living Water, the more awakened I became to the power of the Holy Spirit and how this being I once thought was a mere wispy ghost or feeling, turned out to be illustrated all throughout the Bible as God Herself!
After many months of hungering to know more about the Goddess I soon turned to the internet to make sense of this, surely, other people must know of Her? That is when I found a whole community of believers that embraced the Holy Spirit Shekinah as Her true Goddess self. And what’s more…I found a a phenomenal faith which felt as if it expressed the truth of my divinity and who I am like NONE OTHER. I found Wicca! And I found my true home…to my own making ofcourse. I finally could acknowledge the truth within myself. God is Goddess too!
Brightest Autumn blessings! Love, Ostara