Have you ever wondered how a sweet Christian girl could possibly become a Witch? Or what is the real meaning of the Horned Beast-Man of Wicca? Join the discussion as I dive into my personal explanation of The evolution of a Christian Witch.
I have long been a fan of Disney movies. I love the epic stories played out in a fantastical way. My absolute favorite movies are Sleeping Beauty and Beauty and the Beast. As a child I delighted in the fairies hijinx in Sleeping Beauty and was stragely allured by the terrifying majesty of Maleficent’s power.
In the secondary movie; I became entranced by the provocative story line of Belle and her beloved Beast. I was swept away within the romance of their tentative lovestory, the magick afoot, and the theme of love conquers all.
I find it ironic that as a Christian woman and mother I found it perfectly acceptable for my heroine to be in love with a horned Beast.
However, in my religious path the horned beast would have been equated with Satan himself! Yet this movie won Academy awards, critical acclaim and has become a beloved treasure for little girls everywhere. Why?
Years later, I have progressed on my spiritual growth and discovered Wicca and subsequently the love of many Goddesses, though I still have clung dutifully to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
So as I began to accept that I was born a Witch and learn to wield my powers and gifts, I met many Angels and Goddesses. The Angels felt perfectly acceptable, but it was startling at first to meet so many Goddesses. They would introduce themselves to me in my dreams or meditations, with great flourish, instantly recognizing me as their Sister or daughter.
This, I rationalized, was acceptable because after all, I do consider myself a champion of women’s rights and the return of the Goddess. So, I eagerly accepted my new relationships with my beloved Goddesses from all over the world and many ancient paths.
Never in a thousand years, was I prepared for my introduction to Cerrunos! For those of you that may not know; Cerrunos is the Nature based Wiccan aspect of God in all of His most animalistic, hunter, and quite lustful self. He is the nature of man, literally and figuratively, that drives him full of creative testosterone and powerful fecund strength. Cerrunos is the Horned God and Lord of the Forest. He is the Father of creation and consort of the Goddess Mother of the Universe.
When I first met Cerrunos I was completely taken, enthralled and dominated by his ferocious Spirit. Our souls mated in a deliciously sinful dance of creation that left me breathless! As I lay on my bed, my mind completely possessed by His loving authority; I felt myself tranform. In the moment of His possession, I became Mother Nature Herself.
I could feel my face metamorphosise to blades of grass, my hair become tendrils of ivy blooming with delicate flowers. My body became fragrant hills and fertile valleys. I became aware in that moment of the power of His transformation and thee expansive creative energy of His fertile seed.
What makes this more interesting, is I later discovered that the day was Mabon.
Mabon is the day of the Autumn Equinox, which is the one time that night and day are both divided equally. In Wiccan tradition, we pay our respects to the impending Shadow time of life and give thanks for the waning light as we gather our harvests for the end of the year. Wiccans celebrate the aging Goddess as she passes from Mother to Crone, and her consort the God as he prepares for death and re-birth.
I thought of the story of Persephone, Goddess of Spring. How she was dragged down to Hades for a forced marriage, causing her Mother Demeter, to go in mourning causing the Autumn and Winter. I also thought about how the balance of day and night was symbolic to the joining of God and Goddess in perfect union for one brief day.
I realized with great humbleness that Cerrunos had chosen me to be His Goddess and enact this union for my spiritual growth.
After a moment had passed, he wraped my legs around His waist and cradled me on His lap. I remember the feel of his horns, which are long, strong and magnificent gliding smoothly in my hands.
I felt the quiet strength of His Wisdom and I became tranquil. In that moment, I suddenly felt great shame. I saw Jesus turn away from me and I immediately jumped off my valiant lover’s lap and threw myself upon the feet of my Lord. I begged forgiveness and mercy, all in my mind’s eye, meditatively ofcourse.
However, what occured next completely shocked me.
Jesus turned to me and told me,” You have nothing to be forgiven.” I pleaded with Him and groveled more. But He stated simply,” Do you not understand that the very nature of man I have created, because that is a part of WHO I AM? Do you not see that the very aggressive, powerful, dominant aspect of man is all found in me? I am Cerrunos. I am Jesus. I am FIRE. I am WATER. I am EARTH. I am SPIRIT. I am CREATION.” I now understood that his turning away was not rejection but rather allowing me the space and time to learn, evaluate and make peace with man.
I felt great relief as I considered His words. I realized that this was the first moment that I truly began to understand the real nature of God. And it was also in this moment that I could finally forgive man for their brash actions and rough regard with the state of the world. Intuitively I understood that man unchecked and alone without Goddess could not create Universal balance and that as women it was as much our duty to be strong and fight for our place beside them to perfect the Universal truth of creation.
I looked at my own life, thought about all of the pain I’ve endured at the whim of a man’s beast like nature. Rape, violence, abandonment have been their legacy to me. And I thought of my own beast like nature and how much Wicca had helped me own the Wild Woman and use her wisely rather than constrict her or allow her wanton authority. Life is about balance.
After I came to this realization I claimed Cerrunos as my own and immediately He bowed to me and called me His lady. In that very private moment of surrender, and love I understood the Wiccan Rede of perfect love and perfect trust. It was freely given to me as much as it was given by me. I came to fully realize that God yielded His life because of His deep love for us. This great sacrifice is the very blood force that runs through the land, breathing hotly under the ground through Winter, waiting with baited breath for His re-emergence on December 25th.
Once I fully awakened to who God, and not just Goddess is, thanks to my love Cerronus; I took my final step in embracing Wicca. I discarded the outdated and fearful tradition of a horned Devil and realized the only Devil we face is the lack of Spirit and Love within ourselves. And just as Belle did in my beloved movie; I the Christian girl fell in love with the Beast…and we danced.
Moonbeam dreams and rainbow kisses!