I know what it is like to be poor. And I know what it is like to be alone. I have been a single Mom for a long time and have had my share of struggle. There was a time I was homeless, with four children and living out the trunk of my car until a friend took us in. I remember scrunching me and my children in a tiny bedroom which was hot and the wind through the open window stunk of a septic tank which frequently backed up! My state job position had been frozen. My husband of ten years had left me and I was destitute. And my car, which I had just paid off was totaled in a car accident! However, in a matter of three months I had manifested a five bedroom house! In another three months I had a new job! And in another month I had a brand new car! But how did I do this? At the time I did not know I was a Witch. I just knew that I HAD to get the HECK outta this situation! This was NOT the life I was meant to live! I DESERVED to have a house with a bedroom for each of my kids! I FELT it! I believed it to my BONES. And I couldn’t understand why it was not happening. I went through the complete dying of everything I knew! The complete destruction of all that I held dear, and tenuously at best. First of all, my husband was a drug addict. Why the hell was I holding on to that? In order for me to let go of him and the dismal, woe is me, thinking that caused me to clutch onto him in the first place God/dess had to transform me.
I became Inanna. Like the Goddess, I too went though a transformational process and became my true DIVINE self. So how did I do this? First, I died. That’s right! I nearly did anyway. My blood pressure sky rocketed and I ended up in the hospital with nitroglycerin smacked to my chest! When I came home with beta blockers and a bunch of sticky tabs stuck to my chest, I knew it was time for a life transformation. In the beginning, I had to come to terms with my shadow self. What really died was my own selfish ego. I soul searched asking myself these questions:
What role did I play in my divorce, and my poverty? What conscious choices did I make or think to bring me thus far? What is my divine purpose?
So I began my search in the Bible for comfort and found the Goddess Holy Spirit! I could NOT believe what I found! There in Revelations 11:19-12:-17
“…And the temple of God which is in heaven was opened; and the ark of His covenant appeared in His temple, and there were flashes of lightning and sounds and peals of thunder and an earthquake and a great hailstorm.A great sign appeared in heaven: a woman clothed with the sun, and the moon under her feet, and on her head a crown of twelve stars; 2and she was with child; and she cried out, being in labor and in pain to give birth.…And she gave birth to a son, a male child, who is to rule all the nations with a rod of iron; and her child was caught up to God and to His throne.…And she gave birth to a son, a male child, who is to rule all the nations with a rod of iron; and her child was caught up to God and to His throne.…And when the dragon saw that he was thrown down to the earth, he persecuted the woman who gave birth to the male child. 14But the two wings of the great eagle were given to the woman, so that she could fly into the wilderness to her place, where she was nourished for a time and times and half a time, from the presence of the serpent…..And the serpent poured water like a river out of his mouth after the woman, so that he might cause her to be swept away with the flood. 16But the earth helped the woman, and the earth opened its mouth and drank up the river which the dragon poured out of his mouth. 17So the dragon was enraged with the woman, and went off to make war with the rest of her children, who keep the commandments of God and hold to the testimony of Jesus.”-Bible NIV (paraphrased)
Then when I cross-referenced the Goddess of revelations I found out She was Wisdom, the Shekinah and original Goddess Asherah of Israel. Further than that….she was Isis, Maat, Bridgid, Hekate, Mary, Hagar. The triple Goddesses of the Universe. As a Christian I was astounded. But this was Goddesses way to shake me loose! Too long had I been confined to a man’s opinion of who I am. Am I a bitch? A baby mama? A big booty Judy? Am I black? White? In between? Am I old? Too young? Too outspoken? Too quiet? “How can I please them?” I thought, as I waited with baited breath, for a Prince Charming that only saw Fiona. “What’s the catch?”, I’m sure they thought. And how much of their thoughts of me defined me? How much of my church, my pastor, my parents, my friends and my husband defined me? Why was I defined by their own invention of what a woman should be?
I soon found a place of rest in the bosom of the Goddess. She taught me that I am wise, a prophetess, a healer, a manifest-HER, a Goddess. And I learned that I could define myself!
Finally, I took a first step in finding a spiritual path that welcomed my beliefs and I danced with the Goddess! I also took great wisdom from several books including Doreen Virtue’s collection as well as Silver Ravenwolf’s plethora of book…many of “witch” are still waiting for me to read. I also connected with Rev. Valerie Love whose Christian Witch videos were integral in my coming to accept myself as a natural born Christian Witch! I began giving back what I learned, through my transformation, working with women who had been abused, and single mothers addicted to drugs and alcohol. I counseled, loved, studied, worshiped, meditated and grew to become the woman standing strong today!
As I looked at my circumstances, living in that tiny little room; I decided to take authority and create the life I wanted! I did not know anything about magick or Wicca at that time. I just remembered a verse in the Bible where David, the King’s bard and army commander, prophesied his own Kignship. He held onto his belief even when the king turned on him and chased him into the desert to cut off his head! So like King David; I got up and walked all over their house, visualizing a beautiful home, with an island kitchen and a bedroom for myself and each of my four children. I KNEW in my heart, not just believed, but KNEW that this house was going to be mine and I would have exactly what I prophesied! I also worked towards it by applying for every low income program I could find. And low and behold, a program, that I forgot I had applied for a year ago, tracked me down at former job and left a message! When I called them back the administrator of the program said, “Lady come get your house!” I had no idea that program had houses as they never mentioned such! I was absolutely floored the day I walked into my spacious, beautiful five bedroom home with island kitchen, just like I had prophesied! My house is GLORIOUS!(Although we had the island removed for more space….lol)
Finally, after further growth and transformation; I began my own tarot card business and when I finally made my mind up to “do this thang”…business has been booming! I have a gig at the Harry Potter convention in my home town at a very hefty commission, lemme tell ya! I connected with a wonderful mentor named Bernadette Carter-King, owner of a bookstore, COO of Gator Country online and the instructional page Building Beautiful Souls on Facebook! She is also a renowned Hollywood psychic and spiritual healer! She has been integral in my spiritual growth and business acumen. She is helping me connect the dots and has opened doors of prosperity for me that I never would have dreamed possible three years ago! So here it goes:
Here is a snack version of my total transformation:
- If it hurts you or anyone else STOP!
- Discover your hidden talents, likes and pleasures
- Write a new vision of how you want your life to be. (or a pic album!)
- Pray, Meditate, scream, holler, research, cry, go to spiritual power places (daily)
- Nourish yourself with time outdoors (and take medication if necessary)
- Eat plenty of fresh fruits and veggies (meat can lower your energetic vibration causing multiplicity of fear so be sparing) exercise daily, and take a vitamin supplement
- Connect with nature weekly, daily if you can, and a body of water monthly, meditate with Crystals (I luv rose quartz and for addicts Purple Amethyst is GREAT)
- Practice good hygiene and keep your earthly house as well as your metaphysical house in order. A clean home opens up positive creative energy. (When I cleaned out my closets of tons of baggage I cried for three days…and felt better than I ever felt in my life)
- Every morning speak affirmations over yourself about who you are in Goddesses eyes and create magical expectations of miracles in your life! (It keeps me looking young and beautiful! I’m 40!)
- Beeee grateful for everything! If the sun is shining, if it’s raining, if it’s cold, if you got money in the bank or just know money is coming…..Ridiculous gratitude produces ridiculous abundance!
- Be kind to yourself.(Stop the negative feedback, don’t dummy down, and love your peculiarities)
- Love yourself first. Loving yourself creates an energy of love that vibrates around everyone you come in contact with…and I DO mean LOVE yourself in EVERY….uhum…form. lol
- Give Back. Teach what you have learned thus far on your journey. Celebrate your transition phase!
- Teach love. seek WIsdom and connect with other great and creative people that are into what you enjoy but on a higher level. Be it a church, a coven, a company, a mentor or school…NETWORK and CONNECT
Enjoy your transformation Butterfly Maiden Goddesses and Lad Gods!
*And this is not gender specific or God specific. Whomever you feel resonates in your heart and how you see yourself. That after all is the point!
Rainbow kisses and Moonbeam dreams!