Thanksgiving was c-r-a-z-y! I cooked all Wednesday night, and finished roasting the turkey Thursday! Ofcourse, all the kids were home from school all week for the holiday. I have four lovely children whom I love dearly but can be a bit challenging. All of them have a “touch” of Autism as the school psychologists say. So I have my hands full dealing with their various idiosyncracies. For instance my oldest daughter who is nineteen, can be very opinionated and confrontational. She also has anxiety meltdowns where she begins beligerent tirades if you fail to complete things exactly the way she expected them.
This is one of the aspects of Asperger syndrome. For instance, she refused to participate in our annual “what I am thankful for” go round the Thanksgiving table because we went out of order. This is the same anxiety that sneaks up on her when someone else reaches for her fortune cookie that is in her “designated” place on the cookie tray after dinner. She will refuse to read her fortune or throw a fit, at nineteen! Unfortunately, I did not know she was autistic until I had went through two other children that are also.
In fact, both of my oldest girls got the short end of the stick and have gone undiagnosed because it was difficult for me to see that they had a medical issue, because, well, they are so much like me. So yep, you guessed it…I also have Asperger Syndrome. Asperger Syndrome is a neurological disorder that affects the way the brain processes information and responds to social stimulation. We often suffer from depression and anxiety, however, we also are keenly intuitive, have a very high (borderline genius) IQ’s and are super solution focused individuals.
So I have one daughter who is very rigid and overbearing and would rather relate to animals than people. Another daughter who lives in fantasy land and at thirteen still plays with little pet shops and interacts better with children three or four years younger than her. However, both of my girls are extremely responsible, caring, intelligent and exceedingly creative! They also are very sensitive but very good at hiding it…so if they read this they will have a nuclear level meltdown. I’m sharing this for other mothers. I’m sure as Witches we have many other Aspie folk in our family or covens. I sorta wonder if being a Witch, biologically speaking, may have to do with having Asperger Syndrome? I mean, they say that an Aspie person processes information at super human speed and that is why they often appear anxious, high on their own brains, and a bit off beat. Our keen awareness lends itself naturally to a love of nature (any rational human being should protect the environment), a deep connection to animals, and psychic ability. We are sorta like the evolution of mankind so to speak.
My two sons are equally as diverse. My oldest is only eight but he is very computer savvy and loves to read. He is really tall and athletic and enjoys basketball and every sport imaginable. He is also very aggressive and a bit quirky. He did not speak until he was nearly five. He went through alot being an autistic kid. He was abused by daycare providers and we had to shut them down. I had to go part time from my state job to take care of him full time because my divorce left me raising him all alone. His father is still in complete denial about his son’s diagnosis, probably for the same reason I was with my daughters, he is exactly like him. SO that means he has gone his whole life as an undiagnosed autistic person. Which may have accounted for his jail terms, drug use and alcoholism. You think? Too many men and women go undiagnosed and now as adults we are called the X generation. All I can say is>>> THANK GOD FOR CHRISTIAN WICCA! It saved my life!
Well, my son and I went through alot in our journey through autism and he helped me learn to understand my daughters and their issues, as well as my own. He is the healer in our family. I call him my Angel Boy. In fact, one day in a vision, I saw a white halo on his head and white light completely surrounding him! He is fiercely protective of me and his siblings. He can be a bit oppositional and confrontational, but he is also very gentle and extremely empathic. I believe his empathy is what causes him to get so anxious around people. He is processing all of their emotions. I am teaching him meditation and how to work with crystals. He loves them! Well….not the meditation so much…but he loves his protective rocks! And he is also very spiritual and wise. He doesn’t say much but when he does his mind astounds everyone! He was born on the day of the Feast of the Triple Goddess: Celtic holy day. Day of the Three-Fold Goddess, Maiden/Mother/Crone, the three Fates (Lachesis, Clotho, Atropos), the Morrigan (Ana, Badb, Macha).
My youngest son is five years old. He is a natural explorer and loves exploring nature, bugs, how things work, and absolutely LOVES dragons, castles, and believes he is a knight in shining armor! In fact, when he was a toddler I used to call him T-rex because I thought he looked like a Dinosaur. He has dreams of riding dolphins, training dragons (kinds you don’t see on t.v or read in books), and he has dreamt about being a knight and dying falling off a bridge fighting for a King Gary or something. I believe he is from Atlantis and Scotland, in previous incarnations. In fact, all of my children have seemed to remember in one way or another a previous incarnations or have had dreams of deity. And he was born during Beltane and as expected is very passionate and flirty for a five year old. Honestly, we drive by a pretty girl and you hear him call out the window, “Ay girl!” In fact, older girls and women go googoo eyes over his good looks and charm…I don’t really like that much. He is MY baby! lol…
My oldest daughter, whom I will call Goddess Arianarhod, is prophetic and this can make her very discerning as she has a keen eye for bullshit. She had dreams of Jesus when she was as young as three years old and used to share deep and spiritual truths that astounded others. She could sing and read at six months old. She walked at eight months old and spoke eloquently at two and in other languages by three. She was almost fluent in Russian for a while till she lost practice when her little friend moved away. She is a genius but hates the social interactions of school so she works at odd jobs. She has her own apartment though! And she is a regular Princess Barbie! She also has a psychic skill with animals and has a rabbit, four dogs, a parrot and has owned cats, and a snake and a bearded dragon. She reminds me of the Goddess Hecate or Artemis, with her black hounds. She was born on the Winter Solstice.
My youngest daughter, whom I will call Goddess Brigid, did not talk until she was three. She is a delicate flower and very gentle. She was born on the Summer Solstice. However, underneath the velvet glove is an iron fist. Her nick name is “Boss lady”, since she was small. She is tiny and fiesty! But she is also very motherly. She is a Cancer/Gemini and her only pet is a fish. She loves to sing, read and is an incredible artist. She is very girly and is my movie buddy. She is also the “little mama” of the house. As a small child she could see the nature devi in the trees. She told me they were like people that had jobs and things to do in nature. This was before I knew that any of that existed! She has woke up in the middle of a dream of one of her past lives. I was shocked when I heard her having a conversation in what sounded like Chinese.
Well, as I contemplate my many blessings I can honestly say I am truly thankful for each one of my children and would not change a thing about them. I love them dearly! It has been painful and joyful being an Aspie mom with all my own issues raising four children with various Aspie symptoms as a single mom. It has been a blessing having all of the wonderful people that touch our life and make some of the responsibilities easier to bear. I have learned alot about myself and about others because of my children. Having Autism does not come with a sign on their back, or a wheel chair or anything else to tell the public why my son is licking the walls of their restaurant or my daughter just had a conniption because we ate her fortune cookie. There is no visual perception as to why my child is balled up on the floor crying because another child is in pain at a hospital. Or why he rushes over there, hands extended, trying to heal everybody.
I have learned in a very visceral way to not judge others and how the pain of that can sting. I try to shield my children as much as I can from it but in school they are often bullied and belittled by even the teachers that are supposed to protect them. However, my children will grow up to be compassionate, caring, and creative individuals. Their strength comes from within and that is not a light anyone can extinguish. I am proud of my kids, proud to be their mom. They are my true “harvest blessing.” Have a happy holiday and please remember to look compassionately on others. Open a door for a mother struggling with kids that are driving her up the wall! Take a moment and just be nice. You may be entertaining angels unaware.
Blessings on your holiday season!
Luv, Ostara (And yes…I could run a style blog..I change my hairstyle like I change clothes!…maybe I’ll teach some Hathor Glamour spells next week?) lol…Moonbeam kisses, Witches!